In order to be able to see the Light and blessings from the important spiritual actions we do, we have to make sure our ego does not become involved. When we want people to know what we have done – and respect us for it – we render our spiritual actions almost worthless.

This requires constant awareness, as the ego is very dangerous and constantly on the lookout for ways to come into the situation.

This idea is perfectly illustrated in a famous story about Rav Zusha of Anipoli. He was traveling the countryside and as he entered a certain town, he saw many people dressed up and standing around waiting for a wedding to begin. It appeared there was a delay, and he learned it was due to the fact that the mother of the bride had lost the dowry and could not afford to pay for the wedding.

He went through all the people and found the mother of the bride. He approached her and said, “I hear you have lost your daughter’s dowry. Can you please tell me the denominations the money was in so that I may help look for it?” After telling him all the details, he responded, “I believe I have found your money. Allow me to go back to the inn where I am staying and get it for you.”

He came back a half hour later and said, “I found your money.” Everyone was so excited, and word quickly spread that the wedding would proceed as planned. However, out of the blue he announced, “I want to take a 30% finder’s fee from the dowry.”

Everyone started yelling at him, “What are you crazy- a finders fee - this money is holding up the wedding - how dare you!”

“I’m sorry but I believe I deserve a 30% finders fee, and I would like it now,” he responded. Well, that caused a ruckus, as you can imagine, and the entire family pounced on him, grabbed the money out of his hand, and ran him out of town like a common criminal.

A few months later the leader of that town was visiting Rav Zusha’s teacher, the Maggid of Mezrich, and told him what happened. “I don’t understand. He is a student of yours. I expected his behavior to be exemplary. How could he behave in such a selfish way?”

Perplexed, the Maggid of Mezrich called Rav Zusha over and told him, “I want you to tell us the real story of what happened in that town.” Rav Zusha demurred, saying he would rather not because it was too embarrassing. After going back and forth, the Maggid finally said, “I command you, as your teacher, to tell me the story.”

And so he told it. “I was traveling from town to town collecting money for my daughter’s wedding. It took me about two months, but I finally raised enough money. When I arrived in this town and heard the sad story of the lost dowry, I decided that since my daughter’s wedding wasn’t for another few weeks, and this one was happening right now, the right thing to do was to take the money I collected and give it to this family.
I did.

But, I wanted to make sure no one would know what I did, so I asked the mother the proper denominations in order to ensure that she believed the money was hers. I went back to the inn where I was staying, retrieved my own daughter’s dowry, and walked over to the moneychanger to convert it into the denominations specified by the mother.

On my way there, my ego started talking to me. “Zusha, who else in the world would do what you are doing now? Who else in the world would take the money they spent months collecting for their own daughter’s wedding and give it to a stranger? Who else in the world is as thoughtful and sharing as you are?” With every step I took, my ego grew louder and stronger.

I realized that if I let my ego grow, my action would become almost worthless. Yes, it would have been a great personal sacrifice, but it also would have been completely taken over by my ego. I knew I had to find a way to both do the important action, and also to finish off my ego so it did not grow from this action. That is when I came up with the idea of a finder’s fee, knowing full well they would run me out of town in disgrace.

It was the perfect plan - I could do the action of sharing, and still be able to diminish my ego.”

The lesson in this story is that great actions of sharing – when done in such a way that the ego grows - become almost worthless. As a matter of fact, they can even be detrimental. We want to be careful that whenever we do positive actions - especially if they are large and significant – that we also think of ways to prevent them from growing our ego. Only then can we be certain that these actions will bring as much Light and blessings into our lives as they can.